By Any Objective Standard, This Is a Terrible Review

Steve Simels, reviewing the DVD of Speed Racer, writes:

Don't get me wrong -- by any objective standard, this is a terrible, terrible film.

Simels knows, or should know, that there is no such thing as even one, let alone several, objective standard for judging films or any work made in an artistic medium. No one has ever successfully devised such a standard. But Simels uses this sentence to impress impressionable readers and convince them that his review is something more than merely his subjctive opinion.