Bush's Secret War Plan For Iran

Say what you will about President Bush, but he doesn't believe in half-measures.

Thanks to sources under deep cover whose identity I cannot reveal, I have become privy to a general outline of President Bush's secret solution to the looming problem of Iran's nuclear program.

Without consulting anyone except those directly involved in this military operation, the president will give the order to execute a secret mission code named "Cure." A secret, experimental aircraft (pictured above) long under development will undergo final preparations to carry the experimental, one of a kind, Cobalt-Thorium G "World Destroyer" nuclear warhead.

The aircraft will be launched from Area 51, climb to suborbital altitude and then accelerate to approximately Mach 6.8.

It will deploy the World Destroyer over Iran and then proceed to return to base.

The World Destroyer will air burst over Iran at an altitude of about 6 miles. It's effect will be to literally destroy all human life in the country and deliver enough gamma and neutron radiation to penetrate even the hardest underground facilities.

As soon as he has received word that the mission has been successfully accomplished, President Bush will make an unscheduled speech to the nation announcing how he has courageously taken action to protect America from the threat from Iran.

Bush will later award the plane's pilots with the Congressional Medal of Honor.